becomes congressman, blames presidential power // becomes president, blames congressional power
mars volta's biggest fan // who's at the drive-in?
says 24-hour cable news is ruining america // is watching 24-hour cable news
fiercely proud of white culture // thinks shakespeare's 'gay'
food is too hot // keeps eating
bored all the time // bores all the time
impeach bush // reelect obama
fears homosexual agenda, bashes queers // well gee, i wonder
finds porn degrading // watches porn because of it
hates annoying upper-class hipsters // is annoying upper-class hipster
loathes preachy evangelicals // is vegan
2.3 million prisoners, none of them presidents // 'with liberty and justice for all'
wishes there were more real world activism // RT if you agree
opposes western imperialism // next adolf hitler
commits crimes against humanity // well it depends